Constructive Criticism and How Not to Spill the Beans

Have you ever felt overly criticized?

Maybe a little self-conscious, in a peer group reviewing your paper, in a group project helping each other fine-tune a speech? 

Have you ever read the comments from a professor, scrawled in red ink in the margins of your paper in thick pen, in barely legible writing? 

Have you ever felt confident about something you had fun creating, but then when it was peer reviewed/edited/commented on, you felt about as big as a pill bug?

You may have been the victim of criticism. And often, it hurts. 

The people commenting on your work probably meant well (unless you happened to get "that person"), and they probably meant to build you up and not make you feel like a bug with an exoskeleton. 

If you have ever experienced criticism, or have given it, you know it can be a hard thing to tackle. Often, when work-shopping a short story in one of my classes, and hearing the ideas and critique of the other students as well as my professor, I had to remind myself that they meant well, that it was not a bad story, and I made myself hear the negatives while focusing on the positives.

As a freshman in college, I must confess: I had a really thin skin. Part of me felt like throwing my work away, while part of me wanted to prove everyone wrong, that I could be amazing! If you have ever felt the same way, then never fear! Help is here!

As this blog is aimed to inform you and give tips about life in general, I have decided to attack this idea of "constructive criticism" in three ways: Specificity, Positivity, and something my professor Dr. Eck called, "the Sandwich". These tips are aimed to give you advice on delivering criticism gently.

I will also give a final few tips on how to receive criticism, because, as I said, if I struggle with that, I am sure there are others who do, as well.

Remember: there is always a place for criticism, and especially constructive criticism. While the first often is there to scold us, or rebuke us into changing our ways, the second often feels the same, but I equate it more with guiding someone to the right path, while pointing out what is holding them back.

Constructive Criticism and How Not to Spill the Beans

Have you ever felt like spilling whatever you are thinking, especially when something you're reviewing is just, well, not great? I can relate! The first step to NOT spilling the beans in your brain is to be specific. 

#1: Specificity

Let's look at an example. When you are (or were) writing a paper for a class, and got back the paper with the professor's illegible handwriting (or online comments), do (or did) you feel like they had no idea what they were doing? Maybe you got back generic comments that you felt had no bearing on your paper. Possibly, the commentator was not specific.

Being specific will help you deliver criticism gently, because you will be focusing on only the things that are "wrong". You will not be stating only that the entire work needs revising, but specifically just the thesis, to go back to our professor example. 

I once had a class where I had to peer review a classmate's resume. I am one of those people who writes on the papers I am given, to revise and add comments. I often ask first, in case the person doesn't want to have my handwriting all over their nicely printed copy. Asking first will show the person you want to help. 

Being specific also pinpoints what is going right in the work! As I was peer reviewing that classmate's resume, I added not only specific comments on what should be changed, but I would add smiley faces or comments on what I liked. This shows that they are doing well and helps, in my opinion, to offset the negatives of what you are saying.

Another tip when being specific: when criticizing a certain area on the work, such as a resume or paper, ease into the comments you're making. Say something nice, and then say something like, "Maybe bold this header, to add more contrast?" 

That makes your comment a suggestion, NOT a full-on scolding. Those are usually well received. 

#2: Positivity

As we just learned, using positivity in comments helps to ease the reader into the idea that something in their work needs to be changed. Being positive builds them up, and is constructive, which is really the entire point of criticism: you want to guide someone, and not make them feel like a tiny pill bug like before. :)

I have gotten papers, and I'm probably not the only one, that are just the facts and the comments are not super warm and fuzzy. That is totally fine! If you are one of those "facts-only" people, then don't think you have to add any smiley faces or happy comments on work you are reviewing. Just remember, be specific, and be kind, and understand that rhetoric works to make the reader more lenient to what your'e changing on their work.

If you do want to add something positive in your comments, make sure you get back to the point and get to the thing you are changing. For example, if I was writing a letter that said I would not hire you for the job, I would say thank-you and a few nicer things to ease you into the bad news, and then would get to the point, and then would create a nicer ending that inspires you to keep trying. This can be known (by my professor) as a sandwich. 

#3: The Sandwich

*Shout out to Dr. Eck!

The Sandwich is made up of three components: one positive thing, one (or more) changes you would make, and then another positive thing. We did this in my creative writing classes with Dr. Eck, when we would workshop short stories written by certain students. We did this to guide the writer into how the story might change for the reader, and what the reader responds well to. This tactice employs specificity AND positive comments. 

Now on to receiving criticism.

Truth: there will be someone who always gives criticism that hurts. It's the way life is. Another truth: criticism is never fun to receive. Never. We would be happy, as humans, to feel that everything we do is amazing. 

And a lot of it is. But a lot of our work, well, needs work. 

The main thing I can tell you is this: you are awesome. You were made for a reason. All because you are criticized does NOT mean you are a failure. On the contrary, you are learning! That is the mark of a truly genius human being.

So, take criticism as a way to learn. If someone offends you, tell them (gently!). Be specific. 

Last thing: comments (unless they are for a job or a grade) are optional, especially in creative writing. You do you. Just be a good you.


Taking criticism is one of those things that feels like you are swallowing soap. It's okay. No one can make you like it! Just remember to receive it the way you would want someone else to receive your criticism.

Iron sharpeneth iron;so a man sharpeneth the countenance of his friend.

---Proverbs 27:17 (KJV)

Remember: those who love you will strive to guide you to be the best possible you there could be!

God Bless!

---KatG